Brain Dumps and Mind Thumps

So I want to build up the southern wall and create the succulent garden, I made the measurements today. 13' 8" long by 32" high roughly 50 bricks, since some need to stick out. 50 bricks at home depot cost about $1.14 so the whole wall will cost about $57 for the bricks plus the cost of the mortar. That is about $5 for 80lbs and Ragazzo says we need about 3 bags, so $15 so about $72-$75 for this complete project. I can afford that. The next project is the retaining wall, initially I was thinking railroad ties, but those are fucking expensive!!!! So I will build it with concrete blocks like the wall. This retaining wall will be 28' from the southern wall then turn towards the house and continue for another 9'. S that roughly 84 bricks then turn and an additional 28 bricks for a total of 112 bricks roughly $130.  Now, from this retaining wall I want to build another shade structure. It will start at the flower bed (roughly 3'-4' from the souther...

Il Ragazzo left for Taos this morning, he's working with a new job, and that is great, he started a few days ago. He is a lot less stressed, which means a lot more relaxed Ragazzo for kitty to play with. So I lost all the measurements that I had for the backyard. But after I took the measurements the first time Ragazzo bought a Bosch laser measure-er. I love this thing!! Best to use it at night when it's easier to spot the damned little red dot. I was able to remeasure the whole backyard in a just a few minutes. With Ragazzo out in Taos I don't know what to do with myself. I don't like being alone here, I miss him so much. But I am also happy that he is off working, and making money. But sleeping alone is lonely, I'm shocked at how quickly I adapted to being with him and... Kinds maybe, sorta, depending on him to have my back. Kinda pains me to admit that I need help, or want help... But I love him, and want him around me. But, for the next few months I have...

I don't want to be getting my hopes high, but my period is late... Again. Granted sometimes it just comes late, but last night Ragazzo and I were getting ready to have some fun and he asked if I had started yet, I said no and he said that was a little cause for concern "because you usually start about this time don't you?" it made me stop to think, I never really think about this stuff, it kinda startles me that he remembers these things when even I don't. Not just my cycle, but also little things- or rather things that are 'little' to me which could be big to other people. He remembers the night we first had sex which he counts to be the night that we officially started going out. Every month, on the 13th, he says "happy anniversary". He even made me a little crudely made dog tag with my name on one side and 41312 on the other side. He didn't like it much, said it came out wrong, but I adore it. I took it and want to put it on m...

Wow, odd to think that it was a simple question that spawned a simple search that lead me to find deeper answers on a website for christianity and G-od's love. "Each of us has five significant parts in our lives. We have the physical, the emotional, the mental, the social, and the spiritual. All five of these parts are designed to work together in harmony. In our search for intimacy we want the solution today, or yesterday. One of our problems is that we want "instant" gratification." This is something that I never knew about before, or if I did, I sure don't remember it. This makes a lot of sense, so does this: "It is easier to be physically intimate with someone than to be intimate in any of the other four areas. You can become physically intimate with a person of the opposite sex in an hour, or half-hour -- it just depends upon the urge! But you soon discover that sex may only be a temporary relief for a superficial desire. There is a much dee...