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Showing posts from 2012

D.215\12

D.215\12 So I drank enough last night to loosen my tongue but not too much that I couldn't remember what I talked about. On our way back home I asked Ragazzo what he wanted, because he says he didn't like that woman from the other night at Lowe's who just got into the truck and left the older man to do the heavy lifting. But then again all the women he's dated and been interested in we're the skinny girls who are normally very girly-girl. He explained that he liked the women in the middle- that all his exes use to be in the middle. They would be girly but also wouldn't mind heavy lift and dirty work. But after a time they would change and just want to be girly-girls and not do any work. Even his exwife changed and her father would get after her for it as well. I countered with- well everything and everyone changes, as much as women say they don't want to be apart of the old type gender roles, when they are in long termed committed relationships they norma

D.214\12

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Tonight is APA, I told Gina that I'd wear a dress today. But that is not until tonight. I need to cut the branches with the reciprocating blade but I'm tired and I am feeling lazy. I know I have to do a lot of this work on the backyard, seeing as it is my idea. I'm still shocked that Ragazzo is doing a lot of this work, I thought he would have supported the ideas but left all the work to me. I'm so happy that he is helping with most of this heavy lifting. So last night we were at Lowe's and while we were waiting for the blocks to be brought out to the truck two people, a older couple, came out with some heavy lifting items. The woman went directly to the truck cab and got in leaving the guy to load the items himself. Ragazzo made a comment saying she was lazy and I pointed out that most women are that way. He said he knew, but still didn't like it. I'm not a girly-girl, never have been. Sometimes I do like to dress up, but even then I'm a tomboy th

D.213\12

So I want to build up the southern wall and create the succulent garden, I made the measurements today. 13' 8" long by 32" high roughly 50 bricks, since some need to stick out. 50 bricks at home depot cost about $1.14 so the whole wall will cost about $57 for the bricks plus the cost of the mortar. That is about $5 for 80lbs and Ragazzo says we need about 3 bags, so $15 so about $72-$75 for this complete project. I can afford that. The next project is the retaining wall, initially I was thinking railroad ties, but those are fucking expensive!!!! So I will build it with concrete blocks like the wall. This retaining wall will be 28' from the southern wall then turn towards the house and continue for another 9'. S that roughly 84 bricks then turn and an additional 28 bricks for a total of 112 bricks roughly $130.  Now, from this retaining wall I want to build another shade structure. It will start at the flower bed (roughly 3'-4' from the souther

D.209\12

Il Ragazzo left for Taos this morning, he's working with a new job, and that is great, he started a few days ago. He is a lot less stressed, which means a lot more relaxed Ragazzo for kitty to play with. So I lost all the measurements that I had for the backyard. But after I took the measurements the first time Ragazzo bought a Bosch laser measure-er. I love this thing!! Best to use it at night when it's easier to spot the damned little red dot. I was able to remeasure the whole backyard in a just a few minutes. With Ragazzo out in Taos I don't know what to do with myself. I don't like being alone here, I miss him so much. But I am also happy that he is off working, and making money. But sleeping alone is lonely, I'm shocked at how quickly I adapted to being with him and... Kinds maybe, sorta, depending on him to have my back. Kinda pains me to admit that I need help, or want help... But I love him, and want him around me. But, for the next few months I have

D.207\12

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I don't want to be getting my hopes high, but my period is late... Again. Granted sometimes it just comes late, but last night Ragazzo and I were getting ready to have some fun and he asked if I had started yet, I said no and he said that was a little cause for concern "because you usually start about this time don't you?" it made me stop to think, I never really think about this stuff, it kinda startles me that he remembers these things when even I don't. Not just my cycle, but also little things- or rather things that are 'little' to me which could be big to other people. He remembers the night we first had sex which he counts to be the night that we officially started going out. Every month, on the 13th, he says "happy anniversary". He even made me a little crudely made dog tag with my name on one side and 41312 on the other side. He didn't like it much, said it came out wrong, but I adore it. I took it and want to put it on m

D206.12

Wow, odd to think that it was a simple question that spawned a simple search that lead me to find deeper answers on a website for christianity and G-od's love. "Each of us has five significant parts in our lives. We have the physical, the emotional, the mental, the social, and the spiritual. All five of these parts are designed to work together in harmony. In our search for intimacy we want the solution today, or yesterday. One of our problems is that we want "instant" gratification." This is something that I never knew about before, or if I did, I sure don't remember it. This makes a lot of sense, so does this: "It is easier to be physically intimate with someone than to be intimate in any of the other four areas. You can become physically intimate with a person of the opposite sex in an hour, or half-hour -- it just depends upon the urge! But you soon discover that sex may only be a temporary relief for a superficial desire. There is a much dee

D.048\12

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            I was given some handmade lotion some time ago and it really helped my dry skin- I seriously am not bred for this arid desert and since I can’t get the hell out of dodge just yet I must make do. This lavender lotion I was given was thick, like a whipped crème and it was amazing! So I have been researching handmade lotions ever since and was shocked by how easy it was.             So after research and theories I put everything to the test and last night, after making it back early from class, I tried my first batch ever. I went with the beeswax lotion as my first experiment since the other recipe calls for more accurate temperatures in order for the ingredients to properly emulsify.             I have mixed feelings about this batch. I used simple ingredients for my first experiment and know now that I need to try other carrier oils. I used Beeswax, Olive Oil, Coconut Oil, Essential Oil (Rose and Lemon) and Vitamin E oil. Perhaps I should have tried something other than Coc

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